At a loss

Perhaps some people like me were never meant to love or be loved. I am still debating whether this is true or love is indeed just but an illusion.
I have met and liked enuff women in my short career as a skirt chaser. I have chased and I may report that I havent been sooo unsuccessful.

I must have a gene integrated in my DNA ensuring that my relationships with the Beijing equality supporters will not survive. Either am totally clueless about what women want,too selfish or just a plain dandaa when it comes to skirtwearers turned trouser wearers.

Their beauty takes me,the way they talk and walk,their ability to romanticise even the wierdest of circumstances, appreciation of the colour pink, to love dogs and cats as if they were human...and to be so jealous of even the most platonic of friendship between their( in the true sense of ownership) man and another woman but themselves.

It is their ability to convince a man that they love him even when they dont,cry to make sure things go their way...and my own inability to fathom them.

At times I wonder if the men who make a lifestyle choice and date fellow men didnt, as a priest in the coast mentioned, give up on women due to their inability to fathom them.
Try as i might however,i cannot see anything attractive about a fellow man.....and therefore i cant make that choice.
I still have to go to a woman,i still fall for a woman..I am just a man..a man who's inclined totally towards these people who truly represent Gods creativity and sense for beauty..

I have read and watched and listened to people who try to explain what women want. But there is no consensus as to the person who is right...even women themselves dont agree..They are unique,each one of them..each with her own shortcomings and strengths...none wants what another wants.
I have realised that no matter how many you date,you will never get experience to handle the next one...
They differ so much....
Am now evaluating myself,to rule out my unsuitability as a lifetym mate of some gal..and whether i have never learnt anything after so many interactions between me and women...after all I could be from central or Coast where the average number of partners is 8.3 and 7.something respectively....and the prevalence of HIV is still low in both provinces..they should share the secret with the rest of kenya.

If I am genetically wrong wired as to be totally inept in sustaning relationships, Am I then meant to just never really have a family but to ensure continuity of the human race?.

If i know the real truth,I will be a free man...knowing that I shouldnt mind when they say I am intolerable,or they cant believe they love/d? me ,I will smile and know am just being me..fulfilling my destiny of spreading unbound love,that is also not binding....and I will die of a natural cause such as a disease,road traffic accident,air crash..or simply not wake up one day..when am beyond a hundred years...happily..with only those with fond memories coming to feel sad for a few minutes that am dead,and those with a mixture of good and bad memories of me wondering whether to be sad or happy,and mostly those who will just come to say good riddance....
But since I haven dated a cougar yet, maybe i will outlive all of them and none will be around by the time am 120yrs...since that is our MOU with God that I will live to see cars get off the road and fill the skies....
And it wont matter anymore....